As adults, and even as kids, we understand that in order to be good at something we need to work hard at it. Yet we are constantly frustrated when we aren’t amazing at something right away! It can be tough to encourage a student to keep working when they cannot get over that hump of “I need to be bad at this first before I can be good at it”. I see students get frustrated when they don’t get something right away or they decide not to practice because the thing they are working on doesn’t come easy to them. Here are a few basic tips I use that help kids continue to grow and love music when it becomes difficult and overwhelming.
Be enthusiastic about successes. This seems like a basic one. But when a kid is really frustrated and they cannot play the bar or beat or rudiment right. I always congratulate them on getting any aspect of it correct. You didn’t quite get it, but your hand movement was great, or the first half was perfect, now we just need the second half. This always seems to light a fire in the student to keep going.
Encourage failure. Usually when a kid is getting really frustrated I will often tell them, “ok this time I want you to play it wrong” or “show me what not to do”. This usually makes the kids laugh and do something goofy. But it helps to show them that I don’t care or expect perfection when we are learning something. The biggest thing for ME to remember is to stay patient and never get frustrated.
Get kids to practice at home with a “fun sandwich” structure. Start with a warmup, then play something you are really good at or love playing, then try the new thing thats frustrating. Always end with something you love doing. I usually suggest playing along to a song they like or doing some fun sight reads with www.rhythmrandomizer.com.
Being bad at something is really demoralizing, but with the right direction and encouragement it can become common place. Once we realize that being bad is necessary to being great, we can cut ourselves some slack.